Rainy days..

Rainy days. It never fails to cause depression.

A friend whom once cheered me up, came to me online suffering from momentary depression. I am bad at cheering people and i say the wrong things always at the wrong time. I feel really lousy i didn't manage to cheer him up, or at least make him leave his depression. So i decide to join him.

I often wonder how some of my friends manage to be there for everyone, has the charisma to charm everyone and the ability to care for everyone around them.
These few special friends, they are so nice that i there is not an iota of bad habits, bad thoughts which i can linked it to them, no matter how hard i try (this is just to emphasize how good they are).

I feel insecure. I worry that one day my friends will all leave me.
I am afraid that one day when i die, no one remembers i once lived.

Post Christmas blues...

Post Christmas blues. I didn't know it existed till today. Crappy SIM is the caused of it all. Today, two of my classmates got their appeal results. They didn't make it. Likewise i doubt i will too.

Feeling extremely lost at this point of time.

Merry Christmas..

What a Merry week.

Tuesday
Met up with bird-day girl Peijia, together with Denyse, Rekha, Wendy and Zhiqing at Fish & Co. It was my first time there and the food there deserves a rating of 4/5. We spent the night chit-chatting about the usual do-you-rememeber and i-saw-him/her stuff.

Wednesday
Had dinner at Nooch (also my first time) with Lily, Zizi and Zany. Haven't seen them since graduation which is like four months ago. It was pretty odd initally, us not being able to laugh at each others every crappy joke, the way we used to back in poly days. But i gradually got back that feeling. Happening events of the night would definitely be.. Zizi and Lily flirting with the waiter in Nooch, You go girls! Old habits die hard but it was totally hilarious to watch you both at it. =D

Thursday
Collected my phone from Nokia Care. Darn 6230 keep failing on me. Irony in this situation, I AM A NOKIA PROMOTER (What the..).

Friday
Christmas eve! Had a short lunch with Michelle and Prisca at Tampines Mall.
Celebrations no idea at this point in time.

To all my friends! Merry Christmas!

Tired..

Wasting my time, disrupting my assignment mood momentum to blog. Actions like this is so typical and i constantly blame it on my short attention span. Anyway...

My weekend was Great(with a capital G) !

1. Got a ring as my christmas gift from Marker dearest. I feel really bad that he has to spend the rest of the month eating grass because of the gift but hopefully Raffles Place grass is juicy enough for his appetite. =P

2. Was working at the Starhub Christmas fair with 5 Nokia promoters Shuan, Ignatius, Jin Ping, Tze Ping and Mich. It was literally "Hot as hell" with the constipated weather making the weather unbearably humid but thankfully the great company working together and the constant little treats by Michele made workin so much fun.

3. Was hanging out mostly with the two brothers and an observation which totally impressed me is....they are super chilli eaters, eating tom yam noodles with cut chillies, when i was already choking, drinking the tom yum soup. Pros!

Okie.. Thats all folks.

Mahjong Crap..

Back from another night of mahjong with my Andy, Ian and Sze han(friends cum nokia colleagues) and i am down by 60 bucks(damn damn damn!!).Last night was definitely the worse session i ever had but oh well it could have been worse, not sure better in what sense but it sounds better this way. So far i only had 4 hours of sleep and yet i'm feeling more awake than ever, probably could be still suffering from the shock, the depression, the embarassment of losing every bloody chip in my drawer.
But well.. it could have been worse. Think i'll just stick to bridge next time.

Trouble in school

School is becoming a big pain-in-the-ass. Making life difficult for me and all students alike, in an attempt to earn more money for themselves. Just because i chose a different path to reach my bachelor studies i am punished heavily for it.
I hope some government bodies will make rules and guidelines that bloody private schools like University of London has to follow and stop them from exploiting us too much. After paying so much before even starting my lessons proper, i still have to pay another few thousands for the examination papers and thousand of other nonsensical miscellaneous fees. Now after being in the course for close to four months, i get a letter telling me that my application has not been approved.
So continues another few months of worrisome wait to know the outcome of the appeal because apparently, over at the London side, there is one and only ONE person who has the ability to read and review four sheets of paper with words on it telling them why they should reconsider my application. Email seems too futuristic for them to handle therefore everything should be done via snail mail thus extending the time needed for the result to get back to Singapore.
My advice to those who are considering joining this "WONDERFOOL" school. Do not be shy to bug the coordinators to get what you want. For the amount that has been paid and will be paying in time to come, this is the minimum expectation you should have of them.

Scary Drive

Wow.. a sure sign that my life has become less busy can be seen by the number of times i blog in a week. This is my second blogging for this week, something which have not been happening since mid September.

Anyway today is like any normal day but today is slightly more special because it is today that i had my virgin solo drive home. Yup, i drove home without the guidance of seasoned drivers, drove home all by myself and parked de car too! It was seriously nerve-wrecking but thankfully i got home alive. =)

Finally free..

Finally i have the time to sit and blog, very long time since i last blog now i'm filled with so much thoughts that i wanna share. The past two weeks has been extremely packed with activities, i was literally hopping from place to place, a few places a day. Fulfilling my commitments and promises made.

On Jason's comment in one of my entries, he can't be more right when he said as humans we just love to complain. When i had a simple, relax, go-to-school life i complained that it was monotonous and now that I have activities almost everyday, I really would like to complain about how tired i was and always trying to catch up on lost sleep but then again, i dun wish to prove Jason right.

Life is full of surprises, things which i have never thought would happen to me did. In the few weeks that pass, i saw myself in a book, did some catwalk and appeared on tv. Now that all these are over i'm left with an odd feeling nestling within me. The feeling is somewhat a mix between wanting to do such things on a more regular basis and not knowing how i can get myself started and if i'm up to it.
I have never dared to consider this as a career option but now that i have taken a small step towards it, i feel i want to give it a try so that i will not live the rest of my life wondering what if i had done this?

Try to spot me here

Enough of army already!

Our oily faces! 

Finally i did something today which is more exciting than my usual dull routine.
Had a minature secondary school class outing at Marina Bay with turnout by Amber, Denyse, Cher Xiong, Ian, Janson, Jason and Yanlin.

Dinner was BBQ steamboat at Dragon something restuarant where the waitresses wears trendy yellow t-shirts as their uniform and are capable of suddenly developing very bad cases of short-sightedness when you ask for top-up of the soup.

Overall everything went nice and well, the sky was good, food was good and company was fun. The element which could make every so much better was if ONLY the army talk and terms like POP, ORD, 24KM, Alpha, Tekong didn't keep coming out from the guys mouth. Interesting was only in the beginning, thereafter things started to sound the same and the thing which impress me most is how they can after they finish a topic, go back to a particular topic they talked about half an hour ago.
Impressive eh~

Guys and army..
before they went in, they were full of complaints now they can stop talkin about it.

Good old Mid Autumn..

Life has become so boring since school starts, so much so that i have nothing to write most of time.

Today was slightly more interesting than usual as according to the Lunar calendar its a day for lanterns, candles, mooncake, chinese tea and pameloes(or is it pomelos?). Its my mum's birthday as well so other than those food mention above, chocolate cake was included in the menu as well.

Celebration was at good old Pasir Ris Park, activities for the night is basically sitting around, talking and playing with candles. Especially enjoyable was my futile attempts at helping Nicky set his mini campfire using pathetic rain tree leaves and damp twigs.

Lucky for us the weather was great and the moon was at its brightest. Happy Lantern Festival guys!

Special thanks to my friends..

To Jo, Mich and Jon who left me such sweet and encouraging messages, thank you all so much. Actually i wasn't depressed when i wrote that particular blog, maybe just a little sad and tired thus creating a sad aura. But it is really comforting to know that i have you guys still concerned about me.

Today was rather great! I manage to finish a book, went out with Marker to shop for gift and then went to pick his dad up from the airport. It sounds really boring but we had fun somehow, shopping around ghost town Marina Square and crowded as ever Suntec City, him dragging me into the shops he wants to go and me dragging him out and into another shop which i wanted to be at. The sweet joys of being a couple.

I finally finished the book entitled "Good in Bed". It sounds suggestive, like a sex guide book with an equally suggestive cover but the content is great and inspiring. Its about a big girl, grows up hating her body, finds guy who loves her, starts loving herself, then guy leaves leavin her pregnant, she keeps baby and finally she found some else more devoted to her than the first(typical fairy tale ending).
Really nice and sweet with loads of witty dialogues and hilarously funny description. Out at a bookstore near you...

Confuciously confused..

Stoning in front of my com rite now. Unsure of what to do next, I know i must sleep but then again i wanna be in front of my com, why so, i am not sure too.
Decided to blog before snuggling into my comfy bed.

Yes its still way too early to give my overall review for year 2004 but who the hell cares.

Life is full of contradictions and confusion and i too got confused by the rules of society. When people are nice to you, do they want something in return for their favour or are they born charitable and kind? Things are not always as bad as it seems, though sometimes it is very much worse. This year has been so far so good, things which i never thought would happen to me, happened. Though it wasn't all a bed of roses, I feel really lucky and count my blessings each and everyday.

Work today was at Parkway Parade with a new promoter, Ian. As a newbie promoter, he is so full of enthusiam and drive which i think is exactly what Nokia is looking for and what we older promoter now lacks. Ian is tall, chatty and outgoing and despite his short 5 hrs of work, we manage to talk quite alot and found out quite a few similarities between us.

1. We are both slow eaters, he's like the first guy i know that finishes food after me
2. We both dislike cockles and ended up ordering two bowls of laksa without 'hum'
3. We both eat Famous Amos 'No Nut Chocolate Chip' cookies

I'll end it here.. really really tired...will update it again tomolo for people who bothers and cares about me. Though i'm not sure who would make a stopover at my blog.

Our sentosa trip... 

Sleepy at Sentosa

I went to Sentosa today with Marker dearest.. After my week-long persistent bugging, he finally agreed to go sentosa with me.. Had been wanting to get my tan for very long time now but the saddest thing today was... the weather. It is so sickeningly fluffy and cloudy that instead of getting my tan, we ended up sleeping. Dumb weather which is suitable only for sleeping. After a setting the place we both lied on the mat, did nothing and sleep while the ants made playground of our body, happily climbing up and across our body to the other side of the mat and then back again. So wu liao.. I think if the ants are really playing, they will definitely enjoy more playing on Marker's body due to his furriness because other than just climbing across to get to the other side of his body, they can now hide between the hair on his legs, have a short game of hide and seek, entertain themselves abit before climbing back over. How fun!

Haha.. Sounds corny but what the hell, corny equals prissy, prissy is corny..

Looks like I have to make another trip down to tan again..I didn't even have the chance to take of my top and flaunt my tone bod due to the lousy weather today. Ehh...Did i just say tone bod? Guess my skin just grew thicker during the day due to the coolness of the beach breeze ah.

Look out for updates on pics! Maybe i should take a pic of his leg too, to show you peeps what is furriness.

Falling in love.. with Maths?

Guilt-stricken! Took so much trouble to change the interface for my blog and ended up not blogging. I have been blogging too little these days even though my school schedule is so totally not busy at all. I shall declare that from today onwards i will make an effort to blog at least twice a week.

Today is the start my second week at school. As usual first lesson of the week would be maths, luckily for me the lecturer is freakin funny. While giving lectures he will walk to the back of the hall and stand, only allowing us to hear his voice? Very clever. Another thing about him, he has very reflective glasses and it is simply difficult to even try to make eye contact with him because half the time i was searching for his eyes and the direction he is looking at.

Making friends is slightly more difficult here because unlike poly where tutorial classes were in small groups and aplenty, this school conducts its tuts in a class of 40 and once a week. Till now i am still having problems recognising my coursemates which is quite embarassing because whenever they smile at me around campus, i will either respond with a odd smile or quickly look away. Then when i get back to my lecture hall, i will see them sitting inside. I am a 'dao kia' wannabe in the making!

School day one

Day one overall was great! Not because i made lots of new friends or that i had lots of fun, but because i feel real motivated to study and do well this time round. Though its too early to make such a statement, i believe with support from my parents, my boyfriend Mark and studying kakis like Wanting(my new friend from SIM), Jason and Jon will be able to help me stay motivated?

First lesson of the day was Maths, repeat of what i had done previously in poly. Thank god the lecturer, Mr Syed was interesting and kept the class awake with his once in a while satirical jokes. Though its my first day, i adapted pretty well to the environment coz basically its not much different from poly, except that this school treat its' students well. For every two hours of lesson there is a 15 minutes break and during every break, refreshments are provided for us. Other than refreshments, course notes and textbooks are given to us too! Helped ease the headache of paying $7308 by a teeny weeny bit.


Thank you Daddy...

After paying my fees, a whole stack of books were given to me and they were FREAKING heavy. Thankfully my dad agreed to give me a lift home which seldom happen but today it did. When my dad car finally appeared i was pleasantly surprised. There was a P plate on the the car! He got a P plate for me! When i tried to borrow his car the fia few weeks ago, he rejected me, but tonight... other than getting me a P plate, he too allowed me to chauffeur him all the way back home. I'm simply estatic.. Thanks daddy!

School

Argh.. Suddenly overwhelmed by nervousness. Recieved a call from SIM this morning, telling me there would be an orientation at 5pm. Feeling panicky right this moment, i think i'll take back the words i said on my previous post. Looking forward with excitement? Hell NO! Scared out of my wits seems like the most appropriate feeling to describe me now.

What is happening? The usual gutsy me? GOsh, think i lost it somewhere, someone help me search for it PLEASE!!! Argh~ Memories of how i used to confidently reply "Yah.. go there make friends lor" whenever friends question "You took up the course alone!!". Now i feel like i've just slapped myself in the face. Wished i hadn't been so confident when i said that. That's what you get for believing in yourself too much.

Oh well, time is drawing near for me to get my ass off the chair and make my way down to SIM. Butterflies, can't they just leave my stomach.. Yuks!
Keeping my fingers crossed that i will find something enjoyable there, perhaps an eye candy(?), to kill my lonely torturous 5 hrs of orientation cum seminar cum workshop.

ARgh~~

Back to School Soon

School's starting in another week time. Good news is i haven't paid my school fees, damn UOL just requested for my transcript and I feel so bloody LOST!!
I'm facing quite a few dilemma recently, one concerning my job and another is the degree course which i have chosen.

Concerning my part-time job, i am a part of one of the most established mobile companies on the market and i am proud to be with them but the flaw of this job is the unstable work frequencies, which really gets on my nerve at times. I have found another job which offers me more stable schedule but issues like will i do better there, will i have faith in de products of my new company are bugging me and driving me crazy!

My school, the course which i will be persuing, has a reputation of being a very challenging course and not really related to what i have been studying in poly... Oh gosh, oh my~~!!!
For this matter, i have decided to go ahead and take up the challenge.
Really looking forward for semester to start, have been slacking around for the past 5 months and its getting tedious.

Licences..

Another week gone.. Been really busy the past few weeks, till the extend i now have to update my blogs weekly instead of daily.

Good news.. i got 2 licences last week, one of which was my driving licence, i got that on Sat and i must say Singapore's traffic police department is rather efficient, i waited only for a week before de card arrived.
Another licence was de rock climbing Grade 1 licence. The licence was awarded after a day out in the Sun on Sunday, tying life saving knots and trying out climbs on de rock walls of Safra Toa Payoh. Though de rock walls at STP very much shorter than the ones at Yishun, i somehow tink that its slightly tougher... erh... reason being, coz i failed to conquer one of de walls and i had post climb syndrome like sore arms and legs after de climb..

Wonder what kind of licence should i get next... Bike licence maybe?

I Passed. Like Finally...

Fruits of labour, finally i got a taste of it and man it tastes sooooo sweet.. After 3 tries i finally got what i wanted, that blue card telling the world i have made it!! Now i am able to drive on the road and be 'honked' by impatient taxi drivers, learn lingos and sign languages invented by veteran motorists of Singapore and last but not least create another option for me to end my life fast?

Pre-test period, anyone who saw me then would think i am a nut case, i was talking aloud constantly assuring myself that i will make it. At 4.30pm i was on the car with the tester and by 4.50 i was back in the briefing room listening to the word i've long been wanting to hear.. "You passed".

I got my licence on Friday, 13 August 2004. Not such a bad friday the thirteenth afterall. Gotta wait for another 2 weeks before i will get my driving licence. Till then i'll be eagerly anticipating. =D

I Love Bloggin...

Have not been bloggin for quite a while now.. Finally i'm back in front of de screen to share my life and thoughts again..
Past few days have been fruitful.. Went to sentosa on Saturday. Potluck party with Amber, Jo, Mich and jiajia together with their respective boyfriends on Sunday. Slack around on National day. Went to pay 143 pounds to UOL for admin fees on Tuesday and finally on wed, a nite where the party and booze is darn cheap for ladies, i'm at home updating my blog and chilling out.

I'm not complaining though, i have not been slackin at home for the past couple of night. And right now being alone in my balcony, staring at my computer, absorbing the silence of my neighbourhood feels so right and soothing. Night have always been my favourite time of the day, peaceful and quiet, serene and nice.

A first to Centro...

Chilling out at bakers inn... 
Up! Feeling surprisingly fresh after only 5 hours of sleep and all the consumption of alcohol de night before.. my first time to Centro which i tink will be my last as well was FUN! Excluding the fact that i was on de phone half the nite everything else was superb.. We had lots of free drinks thanks to beautiful Irene who met her lecturer there, we were treated to a few glasses of housepours and 24 shots which i missed thanks to being on the phone so much..Darn..

Supper..super..supper..
After clubbin we went for supper, dim sum at Geylang...We all must have felt pretty high and cranky by then, becoz while waiting for our orders to arrive we were talkin crap and fussing over 4 gigantic fishes in the tank beside us...Irene and Kelly were the weirdest, they kept threatening the fishes, openin their mouths pretendin they wanna swallow the fishes up.. hahah..
Finally got home at 6am thanks to Darran who offered to send us all home.. got home feeling estactic and happy... and guilty too due to heavy spending...

3 hunks for the nite.. Jon, Robin and Darran (L to R) 

Wonders of mother nature...
Back... from Gua Musang... My first climbing trip ever.. Had loads of fun with de walls, the pple and de mosquitos.. It was my first time on a train too, we took the sleeping berths, its not as bad i thot it was, the train has air-con and is pretty clean and neat with de exceptions of a few roaches scamppering around.
Made new acquaintances too, with people like Alvin, Beverly, Chao yi, Derrick, Jason, Junyuan and Siu Foon. All members of the expedition, all very nice and friendly people..

Day 1 Tuesday
After 12 hours on the train.. we finally arrived.. Took a cab to the rock site and was stranded outside de place for an hour coz the security guard was nowhere to be found..and despite the little sleep we had on the train we went to rock climb immediately after settling down. The rocks formations impressed me totally, its amazing how the rocks are formed to allow good grip and great footholds for one to step on.. We climbed till late afternoon and in all i manage to climb 4 routes? I tink? Once back at the chalet, we started cookin a feast consisting of 10 packs of instant noodle. Meanwhile at the other room...they were having eggs with pasta sauce and macroni with pasta sauce..
Cheng Tng was served as desert.. it tasted great except for the uncooked sago seeds which was later used as a punishment for our games.. For our night activities we played games like Bridge, indian poker, bluff, dai dee and asshole dai dee. After the games it was lights out for Alvin, Jason, Siu foon and me, while it was more bridge for Beverly, Chao yi, Derrick and Junyuan.

Day 2 Wednesday
Woke up ard 12 in de afternoon.. where we had to make a decision btw climbing more and slackin ard the chalet.. Even though i was aching pretty badly from de previous day climb.. i was eager to climb again becoz i dunno when i'll be doin this again..
Our lunch was sunflower seeds and melted 'Crunch' chocolate over game after game of bridge.. Climbin ended ard 4 after which half of de group rushed of to the train station to buy tickets home while the other half stayed at de chalet to wait for a person to collect payment? hmm..
The ticketin station was closed when we got there and wld be open only at 9pm later that day... left with not much choice we walked towards de town area and had late lunch and spent the rest of our waiting time exploiting the KFC(one and only fastfood), with just 3 drinks and a box of nuggets we left our bags there and went to explore around the town.. heehee evil pple we are...

Finally... after 5 long hours of waiting.. we finally boarded the train where more bridge was played till it was bedtime...

Day 3 Thursday
Finally home.. left with just an sms informing my dad that i'll be away... so better get my ass home fast.. I had fun.. thanks to all of them.. =D

Pictures of the trip..
Click here

My new acquisition.. Pink! Adidas bag...  

New addition..
Thursday.. went to meet Jason in the mornin to collect my spastic looking Pink adidas bag which costs me only 13 bucks! Included was a pair of matchin Pink socks complimentary from Jason.. hehe..The bag is so adorable, sweet and overwhelmingly PINK! 

 
Pple tht nite...  Prissy, Denyse, Kashari, Rekha, Farhana, Zi Qing (left to right)

Evening was spent with my fwens at Plaza Singapura... having dinner at cafe cartel... And we had an advance birthday celebration for Fahana.. It was great seeing them after like so long since our holidays started and since rekkie came back for the holidays... Nice and fruitful day...

Mum's love...
I had to pissed my mum off for the last time before she left for Korea..Typical hot-tempered me, when will i ever learn to control my temper?
It is odd why we always take people we care most about for granted and this time round its my mum whom i provoked... the one who constantly looks out for me, worries for me and cares for me...the one whom i owe my whole life to and gives me advice when i'm lost..My mum is one whom i would consider as a strong woman, being a career woman that she is and working in a male dominated environment, she has manage to juggle her work and family well. Though she is not expressive in showing her love, her constant peepin into our rooms in the wee hours of the morning and her once-in-a-while chat in our rooms to know about our lives shows how much we mean to her..
I love u Mum and i'm sorry....


Dearest mummy of mine.. 

Busy busy bee...
The past few weeks has left me very very busy indeed, busy till the extend that i'm constantly updating past posts which i drafted but never really published.. I love bloggin but am never fast enough to complete a post in a few minutes.

Other than being busy, i've been losing sleep due to a book which i borrowed from Shawnie(as michie calls him.. lolz) a romance novel from Danielle Steel entitled Full Circle.. I would grade it 8/10 for the inspiring storyline.. The book talks about how the protagonist moves from an innocent teen to a successful career woman who is able to juggle both family and work. Her insecurities on issues along her stages of life and how she over came them and how she handled her emotional conflicts.. Very vague review? I can pass the book to you if u are interested..

On Marker...
He is an ass.. like i have always known ever since i manage to dig out what he did to his previous girlfriend..But somehow after my bintan trip, i seem to be alot more easy on issues which used to bother me alot. And i think credit of coz should go to my friends.. Every single one of them..
Me and mark we started talkin again, with less tension and more normal friendly chat like what we used to have.. It feels like post war era.. where everything is so nice and serene(think huge green pastures and a tiny little cottage in the middle of it, with smoke coming out of the chimney).. hope this war-torn times is gonna go for good..Hello happy times?

Alvernia Hotel...
Went to visit May(Minieyes)..She's down with the dengue and we suspect the mosquito that infected her was a lesbian. Luckily she doesn't look as bad as i thot she would.. She was up on bed laughing and jokin around as though she was there for a hotel stay rather than seeking treatment.. Thankfully she is alrite.. if all goes well we might be able to go rock climbing by next monday AGAIN! But in the meantime, better for her to recuperate first..

Beautiful Friday..
Have not been hearing from Mark for the past 3 days.. and i'm not feeling the loss or awkardness i used to have anymore.
There could be 2 reasons to this:
1. I'm getting independent, which i was all along but more so this time round.
2. My feelings left me, i finally realise that our relation is not goin to work out.

I'm not too sure which one is it, or maybe it is non of the above. It is slightly more than 2 weeks before his return, it would seem really wasted not to hang on, but like wat spencer said, do not stay if you're hanging on because of obligations. Am i doin that?


My new idiotic-lookin fringe 

JB Again..
As like all previous trips, this trip was no difference..the company was fun, the stuffs are cheap, the food is great, i bought things which i wanted and i even got my hair cut. The few disappointments would be the hairstylist sucked, he totally destroyed my fringe! It looks terribly messy now, my kawaii girl image is GONE! Ahhh Idiot hairstylist.. Idiot idiot idiot... Other than the irritatin hairstylist, we had bad durians as well, thanks to kek haha..Overall a simply great day!

Back from Bintan! It was really great and it could have been better if the weather was sunny. Didn't manage to get the tan that i so wanted but it was still fun hanging out with Jon and the rest of his gang. Everything there is just so nice and laid back, i totally forgot about the word 'TIME'. Wished i had stayed there longer. I haven't felt so relaxed for a long long time since my major quarrel.

Learnin Trip
Other than having fun in Bintan, i learnt abit bout Bridge rules too, though i'm not exactly sure how does it work or how do u actually go about playin that game and why the hell do u need to bid?

Totally tiring day. Spent my day Rock-Climbing at Yishun Safra Country Club.. Sounds so posh, but actually anyone who had been or is an SAF staff will have that card. Met up with BingQuan, May, Kelvin, Spencer and at 2 and we call ourselves de~ Nokia Climbing Team. There was a slight drizzle on our way to the club but thankfully it stopped after a while, so there we were climbing away, up and down those harsh and rocky surfaces where it is impossible not to hurt yourself. Luckily for me, all i got was 3 scratches and plenty of mosquitos bites. All in all it was hell of a fun time and with all the endorphines created, i found it almost impossible to lose my temper for the whole day.

I got a card..
Home sweet home was exciting as well.. recieved the long awaited 1 yr anniversary card from Mark. The contents was touchin and sweet like all his other cards and letters to me.. Only this time round the card failed to touch me like how it did in the past. Now i'm sure, something in me has died.

Seriously busy day today
Morning was workin at SMU sellin tablets. How heart-wretching, workin in a school which i so wanted to be a part of, lookin at all the freshies happily walking around and i'm not one of them..Hmm..

Went to catch Spiderman spiderman after work with Jon, Janice & Jimmy (Ehh all startin with J, hehe), all promoters from NOKIA. Overall feel? Not a bad show ah..Kristen Dunst is sooo pweety!

Zizi missing...Stella is found..
After de movie, i rushed down to de airport to send zizi off. I thot i will not be affected by the fact that she is leavin for aussie, but when we were right in front of the immigration doors, i could feel my tears. No parting is ever happy, even between friends.
Though it was a depressing to see a close fren leave, something good came out of this trip. Stella and i started chatting again, which is really great! I will be losing a close fren for 4 mths but i got back a fren who was once very dear to me. This is just the start, hope things will get even better between us both.

Woah.. Finally had the chance to update my blog, had a really busy weekend working at Plaza Singapura. The best thing to happen was, I had Irene and Joshua with me! We were all workin in the Starhub shop, its so fun! The only bad thing is we tend to eat snake more, the 3 of us haha..
Times really passes when u are in a busy place.. PS starhub is freaking crowded, i had to force myself to leave my spot so that i can rest and breathe. Customers stream in like no body's business..
Though i was really busy, thankfully i manage to all print my photos..Cheeeepo me

Smurf can't breathe! 


Dear bloggie.. What a day! I woke up at 10 today for the sake of KARAOKIE! I am so totally addicted to it! Hardcore addict! Was there from 11.30 till 2, KBOX Hougang with May aka Minieyes. We are both YAN ZI fan.. lolz.. First hour of our session was spent on her songs.
It was sort of a hectic day, travelling around sunny Singapore, from hougang.. SP.. SIM.. Orchard.. Home. Wasted quite a lot of money on transport and i pulled May into it as well.. Hehe..
After settling my school stuff, SHOPPING was next on our agenda! Spent the whole evening roaming the streets of orchard, shopping for her shorts and some thing for myself. After some 3 hrs of shopping and trying, we finally bought an item each. Girls, ain't we superb, walking aimlessly for hours and only gettin an item after goin thru sooo much choices and shops.
we took lots of photos too. All thanks to Nokia 1 megapix camera 7610, lookin forward to working on Sat when i can print out the pics we've taken.


Toilet shot 

22nd June. Mark's birthday, and i got a surprise gift! He has been lying to me for the past 3 months or longer? So he has been chattin online in IRC just like before, his excuse, IRC was his life for past 6 yrs, too used to it? Agnes used to be his life for his past 3 yrs? So? Whats so upsetting bout chatting on IRC? Its no big deal really, it only becomes a big deal when MARK was the one who specifically said he would stay clear off it, for my sake? BULLSHIT i must say. Apparently his suck cock buddies and online flirting are too important for him to lose, his life for de past 6 yrs. Blaming me for not trustin him enough thats why he had to go to such extend to hide it from me? Well, yupz its always my fault, always.
But i chose to stay eventually, god knows why? Maybe i just love to be tortured, maybe sub-conciously my views abt love is suffer under de hands of my lover. How am i goin to trust him ever? To him everything is a small issue, this is a small issue. His parents trust him. DUH~! He doesnt seem to realise that he is their only bloody son.
Gosh! I threw away a wonderful boyfriend and swap it for someone like this? My mum told me its my choice, she wun wanna get involve. Who else can i go to? So how should i move on?
Special thanks to his online buddies as well. They did a good job hiding and covering up for his ass. Ban me from irc to prevent me from lookin at the conversation they had. So drama!
Morning msg from MARKER> I'm sorry prissy, Don't give up on us.
Yup? I'm trying hard to believe. To think after all these have happened last, he still manage to cough out words like "i promise i won't chat in IRC again"??!!! Wahaha.. really "...??". He told me he's saving up for tickets for me to go over? Yup? He used to say that too, whenever we had quarrels in the past "I will get a ticket and fly back tomolo if u dun talk to me". Same thing, same empty promises, what else is new?

Feeling rather emotional. Just view Jo's blog, can sense the happiness that she is experiencing. Wonder will i ever get to experience same kind of happiness and love again.
This relationship with Mark has taught me alot of things, both good and bad. He taught me not to trust a person too much, coz when u have too much hope and trust in a person, u are bound to hurt urself very deeply when he disappoints you, even if its over a small matter. He taught me that love is never always a bed of roses and love doesnt mean being the one and only person in that person's life.
That is his perception of love. Not mine. But i am tryin to adapt, i hope.
He's coming back in another month time, most people comment would be 'thats good, things will be better when he is back'. Really? How do they know? What do they know? They dunno what i've been thru, they dunno the things that he did, the heartaches that i went thru, the tears that i have cried. They know nothing but i know they are trying to make me feel better, else wat else can they say? I know for myself how i was treated when he came back for his holidays last year. Looking back at what happened then, i get totally confused abt what exactly am i waiting for?
Sometimes i wonder how long more can i hang on? I'm dejected and depressed, my idealism has left me. Love? What is it all about?

Tired.. Flu for another day.. i've been breathing thru my mouth for the entire day and now my stomach feel so bloated. My nose feels as if i've stuffed cotton into it. I'm now onto my 6th cup of tea includin the one i had at mackers.
I was ON TIME for work!! This is something new. Work was boring as usual, losing the drive and it didnt help that i was sick. I think probably the only entertainin incident today was watching a salesgirl in the Nokia Care Centre flirt with my other nokia colleague, Jonathan. Lolz

My booth at causeway point NCC 
Tonite will be my last nite spent with 7610.. Such a great phone, too bad i'm too poor to own one now. Great phone, big screen, 1 mega pix camera and so much fun features!

My favourite of all shots 

This is another of the pic taken by william and daniel.. Hehe it is digitally enhanced, so there is a tinge of fake-ness in this. But it is my favourite among all shots.
My flu just got worse today and i'm still struggling to work, for the sake of money. Gosh is this world cruel, no money = sad prissy, especially since i'm now paying for my own bills and travel expenses. This is so horrid wish i am still being sponsered by my parents.

My sats results came out last nite, I scored a pathetic 1050, really upset i didnt make de cut-off point of SMU..Feeling really dumb but wat can i do, wat has been done can no longer be undone, all i can do now is to pray that SIM will accept me. *crosses finger*

A few of de shots L to R: Irene & Me 

Sick~ Bad day. Down with flu and migraine.. simply yucky feeling.. been sleepin de whole day and yet i still feel sick.. Even standin up is a problem..
It has been 2 days since i got the photos, the shot was GREAT! really really nice and the only spoiler was my scarred complexion..i dun tink i will ever look this good again man..
William called on Thursday, but this time he mention nothin bout the corporate photos and asked me if i wanted to go Malacca to take more pics. Its so weird that he is being so nice, especially since he's such an established photographer and has won rather prestigious award in photography. He's making me feel so so priviledge. Photo taking is fun! Hope de next session will be soon..

The earrings we made 

Another monday.. still slackin ard after so long.. The weekend was terrible, in a bid to spite mark i got myself hurt too. This is so silly, getting myself so drunk over him and ended up spending my sunday feeling sick. Anyway i had fun today! Went out with irene and fwens to make earrings for charity! So amazing.. though it was our first time meetin each other, we manage to find topics to talk about. We worked HARD on making the earrings which are all for charity.. For de whole afternoon, we made a total of 1~! pair.. and, it was a combine effort of 3 of us girls, joyce, weiling and me.. so much for efficiency?

My first official post after so long. Still figuring out how do i use this blog. The past week could have been so much better, quarrelled with mark most of the time..Long Distance relationship sucks! Mark sucks too, fancy adding some unknown stranger whom he doesnt know and he still has the cheek to tell me, it becoz he can't be bothered with friendster? He thinks its a DARN GOOD valid reason? Hell NO it isn't! Its total CRAP! Pretended not to hear me when i question simply great actor i must say. Living the rest of my life with him has no longer became an item in my agenda, disappointment from him time and time again has worn me out. I really must start moving on. Hope someone better will come along and pick me out of this hellish relationship.
When will he learn? What is his reason? To boost his own EGO? I'm not a guy, guess i'll never know then..

Today was really fun.. Went out with Irene for some photo shoot thingy. Spent 2 hours posing around in front of the camera. Felt like some kind of model wannabe. And the two photographers Dennis and William they were really friendly and professional as well, throughout the whole photo shoot they were both SOooO generous with their compliments, constantly using the words "GOOD", "WOW", "BEAUTIFUL" on us both.. hahaha.. Seriously damn flattered though it did occur to me that these words were just their candies to make us feel more confident bout ourself! After the session william offered to do more shots for me in his studio! Hope he remembers it, SO Exciting!!!
After the shoot, we went to KBOX to chill and SANG in de lounge. Woah! First time in my entire 20 yrs, but the reason why i was so daring was there were no one in it and we only paid 5 bucks for aircon and songs.. looks like i found another good and cheap way to chill.
Following on after KBOX was dinner with Irene's fwen at Balestiar Ba Kut Teh and Harry Potter at Balestiar cinema. I saw BENEDICT GOH!! Man he is CUTE!! GORGEOUS!! WOOOO... Droolz~~~